Derhaka kah aku?

I'm writing this blog when i'm in the MAS lounge KLIA, dunno why i felt that i really need to write something now..maybe because i'm so angry, sad or..i dunt know...btw i'm leaving to Manila today, as usual i woke up early morning pack all my stuff and about to leave the house. While waiting for the taxi my parents "tegur" me about my dressing, its something like this..tak de ke seluar baru...baju yg longgar sket..for god sake at 7 am both of my parents mumbling about my dressing...wanna know what i wear...my normal Miss Sixty jean, baby T with cardigan!!!! what the hell....and there goes the early morning arguments with my parents...

for god sake i'm leaving soon...bukan pergi kerja kat PWTC...Manila okeh...can't they just make me at least leave with peaceful mind that they will be okay when i'm away!!!???!! end up i left the house as so called "anak derhaka" without saying goodbye and salam both of them...well this is not the firs time...EVERYTIME i'm leaving for overseas trip...not to mention almost every morning yang my mom nagging before i went to work.

Well...its been 30 years leaving under one roof with them..and all the stuff i do always a wrong doing to them...i'm sorry that i have to confess that almost 20 years i've been lying to them..just to make them happy...for 30 years i can't make my own decision...until TODAY!!! i'm not your little girl anymore...i am 30 and i think i'm ready to face my life on my own...for 30 years all my life id being control by them..what i do...what i wear..where i go!!! and today i think i can't take it anymore...

i know i'm their fav ones...i'm the spoilt brat in the family..but can't they just think that i became like this is because of they have been controlling my life..and end up i' the one who always memberontak in the house. I know i make my mom always cry about be...but i she give herself a bit space to understand the life i have now...the work i'm into...at least to understand a bit the name of "freedom" to your daughter. I have my own set of house keys at the age of 25!!! i never wear knee length skirt, not even three quarter pants!! mentioning to go for karaoke is a NO..NO things...what else they want me to be?????!!!???

the reason that i still be at that house is to take care of them...or else i might be out already, have my own life somewer...its because i love them...and i know they love me too...but until when i have to be like this..keeping everything to myself...i don't know

Walked Out In Style and Full of Pride

Update - Part 1

Yes..its been a while i havn't update my blog...well last few weeks me & my gals having a mini meet up in A&W Taman Jaya, well Ira just got back from Lumut..well its been kinda lucky day for me..i finally met her..well no need to tell who is she and hell yeah she recognized me too..nothing to be mad or make a big fuss as i know i'm standing higher than her...much higher!With full of respect..hahah...bangga siall!!

After we had our Root Beer and then balik la..memasing ada laki nak ngadap...and i went somewer to do some errands, hahaha....i tot my duties was just collecting the item..but it seems like someone is waiting me to collect the item..the hell with it...its no longer Miss Nice Girl, i just dont know what came into me..but i surely did it...I WALKED OUT IN STYLE AND FULL OF PRIDE! I surely can see from the face that i'm no longer the same person i used to be...i'm stronger and i survived being what i am now.

Hahaha....ira i know you've been waiting for this blog to come out! Blog ni tak perlu gambar...sekian maklum! nantikan part two (2) yang tah bila tak tau..back log dah 3 minggu nih!

Minggu Malas Sedunia..

Yer..ter aku tau dah seminggu lebih aku tak hapdet blog nih...tah naper lastweek malas gila nak update..member2 ku ni dah menyalak2 suruh update..sebelum diorang menyalaks lagiks baik aku update hari ni...

2 minggu lepas weekend tak der mende sgt...yg best Astro dah install.kemain mak abah aku melayan TV..abah nak layan sukan, mak nak layan menatang2...aku tgk travel & living...kira ada astro ni baguih gaks la..aku pun ley lepaks skali dgn mak abah sambil tgk TV..asyik terperap dalam bilik jer...hari Sabtu masak Butter Prawn..nih gambar..jadi gaks la...

Kemain mak aku layan astro

Butter Prawn aku yg ala2 jadi tak jadi

Then last monday aku terpaksa cutis..MC lerhhh...hamik ubat kat doktor..pastu g hamik surat #@$!% ku...after all my errand settle, zass trus to the curve..meeting up my other Stooges! Si Ray as usual la...g Site...Si Ira...MC gak...sakit telinga pastu wat trick muka pucat..ala2 konon sakit betul2 la tuhhhh...dah janji nak makan Sakae sbb ada orang tu naik pangkat...pastu memasing nak tayang Crocs baru lehhh...aku punya gak yg lama..tapi jangan lupa...koleksi aku yg terbanyak antara korang2 tau! (cehh..tak nak kalah..). Nyaris gak nak beli Crocs baru..takut pulak ada org terbakau tahap Dewa lagi la pulak...demi menjaga hati ku batalkan hasratttt...

Berlagak dgn Crocs baru koranggg..

Lepas lepak2 si Ira pulak kene balik untuk menunaikan tanggungjawab sebagai seorang isteri & ibu..hahahah...so aku dgn ray melayan lagi kat IKANO..teman ray beli baju anak2 dia...pastu aku pun menyalak la kat Ray..auk!..auk!..auk!..beli spek itam ni..cara bai..auk!..auk!Terjebak gak..aku punya kaler hijau Ray punya kaler merah...lepas shopping gi minum2 kat Starbucks bergossip lagi! Pastu balik ler....

Spec ala Sharifah Aini nih!

Hari sabtu mak tak balik lagi dari Kedah..abah laks dah g makan kenduri! dalam kelaparan g la Carrefour nak cari makan..nak cari makan...nak cari makannnn...jumpa satu kedai ni..aku rasa ala2 nak tiru secret recipe nama dia Splendid..makan okla harga..takat pasta 12-23 hengget tu ok la...tapi babi..Air Coke RM 6.00!!! sial...ni hah..sampai titis terakhir aku minum air coke nih!

View of air Coke mahal dan my half eaten Bruschetta

Then semalam (8.6.08) i brought my nieces to The Curve...nak belanja my eldest nieces coz she's leaving to India nak buat Dentistry..bawak la yg lagi 2 orang tu..nak bawak sumer tak mampu mak...nak kawal keadaan and budget burst punya ler...kata ada 11 hekor! Sebelum sampai Curve tanya la depa..nak makan apa..western ker..chinese ker...japanese ker...alih2 diorang nak makan Sushi King...aku maleh nak jalan sampai Ikano..last2 aku suggest..Sakae Sushi nak? ermmm...maknanya minggu ni 2 kali makan Sakae...rabak gak la....tapi tak per...tgk anak2 sedara aku mmg suka kakiage...Lepas makan g layan movie tgk Kung Fu Panda, best giler...dah abis layan movie pastu g jenjalan kat Flea Market...kopak mak lagi...memasing merengek nak gelang...tak pa la sekali sekala...

Khairun & Akin

Acu & Mai

Dah tgh2 jenjalan abang aku laks call tanya anak2 dia mana..leceh betul la...abang aku ni mmg protective kemain..kejap2 tepon tanya anak dia! mcm la aku nak jual anak2 dara dia...cheiss..dah tu balik singgah umah kakak aku kat Sunway SPK..rupanya sumer ada sana...

Tu jer ler....takder mende pun yg best minggu kemalasan aku nih...and Today dah stat sekolah...for the past 2 weeks heaven jer bawak keta...and today dah stat jem balik...cantik lak KLCC pagi tadi...misses someone...tak sabar nak tunggu Friday! ;-p

Weekend Ku Sendirian...

Setelah membaca kawan2 ku punya blog..except ray haremmm tak update lagi...weekend ku yang ala2 sendirian...actually kerje last weekend for Citrawarna..check in hotel hari Rabu...pastu lepak dgn ira japs arituh..sian ray semut merah..wakakakaka.. nih gambar melaram dalam bilik aku kat Impiana KLCC

Jumaat kerja..petang gi business session opis kat One World Hotel sampai malam, nak amik gambar dgn Abang Leman aku siap tunggu ramai2 nih! (sapa abang Leman, Timbalan Menteri aku yang jambusss!)..sampai hotel dalam kul 11.30 malam pastu zass tido..sabtu mak bangun tau2 dah kul 11.30 (sah lepas subuh & breakfast aku!)..then mandi siap2 g lowyat survey barang for my staff in manila..tgh2 cari barang perut ada bunyi...lapar la pulakkk..nampak Sushi King..layannn..sorang2 (selalu layan sushi ni dgn stooges2 ku..ari ni sorang pulakkk...sedih gaks..

Dah buntat sorang2 balik hotel layan TV japs..pastu siap2 nak g Putrajaya for Colours of Malaysia punya launching..nak bas dgn group aku..mak dah muak dah nak layan mende2 cam ni..tapi dah keje nak wat camner..dingdong2 sampai hotel nak kul 12++ gaks...mandi2 zzzzzz....

Then hari Ahad konon2nya nak bangun kul 4.30am nak babai2 group aku g sabah..zasss jaga kul 6.00 sah2 diorang dah gerak. Apa lagi tido la balik...and miss my breakfast again...kemas2 pack barang sumer check out then gi KLCC jalan kaki...ronda2 sorang2...tetiba rasa sedih..sedih sbb i'm all alone..jalan tgk2 barang kat Suria KLCC..then lagi satu masalah..nak cari tempat makan..sorang2 jugaks..pusing2 sampai lenguh kaki..then i decided to take my lunch at the Dome, maybe leh la kot ubat rasa sedih aku ni...oder ice tea and calamari & chips..yet still takleh ilang gak rasa sedih...well sometimes being alone is okay..but tah pasal apa yesterday i really felt i'm totally ALONE..nak ajak kawan2 sumer ada family to take care...pastu sambil makan2 i realized that i had all these feelings coz i missed someone...who miles away...come back soon!

Dah abis makan..tak tau nak wat per lagi dah balik jer le...then sampai umah pun lepak2 dalam bilik layan DVD spongebob yang aku beli tahun lepas tak abis2 tgk..

Pastu layan perasaan...teringat kata2 abang Aloy ku kelmarin...yang kedua ni meriah sekali..i hope so what he's saying is gonna be reality. Aminn...mcm Ira selalu cakap langit tak selalu cerah..dan bila kita harapkan pelangi yg datang tapi ujan laks...well i have gone thru all...i've seen sunshine, then gloomy clouds...followed by hurricane...but alhamdulillah...and i've seen the rainbow too...tapi kejap jer ler..(sbb pelangi ni hanya datang selepas hujan!!!pastu dia hilang)...and now SUNSHINE....insyaallah...i want sunshine always in my life..nak Spring pelik pulak kang..kat M'sia ni mana ada musim bunga..wakakakakak...and i smile before i fell asleep..ZZzzzz..

Happiest Day of My Life...

Its bit too late actually..tapi what the heck...tetap jugaks nak citer what happen on the 15th May 2008...my dear fren ira and ray buat mini party for me...my 30th Birthday!! heheh..3 series..tapi mak perasan lilin ada 2 jer..rupanya diorang tak sure aku actually dah tuo dah dari koranggg!!! Well..why its the happiest day of my life..coz all my love ones was there..ehemmm...ehemmm...thanks guys...it means a lot!

Mmg we ols dah planning nak karaoks..supposed on 16th May, tapi dek sebab2 teknikal si Ray tak dapek..kerna itulah bring forward to 15th..harus la mak amik cutis....melalak kemain...tgh2 nyanyi tetiba lagu stop..pastu ada kek masuk dgn background lagu Hepi Besday versi katun Jepun..hahahahha...anyway mcm nak nangis..tapi tak leh kuar arrr..sbb aku heppy giler..maklom la tak pernah org buat besday aku camni...

Apa aku dapat? hehehe....si ira bagi aku lampu stok geli2..heheh..siap dgn lilin wangi tu..mmg padan dgn interior bilik aku....harap2 llin ko tak cair sendiri la sbb aku plan nak guna tahun depan..bley???hiks...gatal tul aku ni! pastu bley dia paksa aku pasang gak malam tu...geli2 sendiri ler aku...hahahahha...bijiks tul...ni ha tea candle standee ira bagi..cantik bai..thanks..

Si ray pulaks kasik gelang Dymium..aku mmg nak beli gelang ni kat dia, alih2 dapat hadiah besday...(weh ira...ni masak kita ni...bulan 9 ni mampos kita nak cariks hadiah dia,,,mau gelang emas ni..kata bini askar!!!hahaha)...lepas ni aku kuat ala2 superman la ni...siang malam aku pakai ni..sampai2 pening kepala aku!heheheh....

And yang paling mengharukan...aku dgn ray dapat hadiah best dari ira..maklomlah org tu baru balik Bandung...amin dapat telekung sorang sepasang...bley dia kasik aku telekung sulam kaler silver..si ray kaler gold (again alasan si ray suka emas..kata bini askarrrrr...hahah..sorry ray! bercanda!)...thanks again ira...! Ray asyik jemaah kat karaoke jer..bila nak jemaah semayang ni...??? zufff....rentung!heheh...

Woi..jom solat jemaah..bley test telekung ira bagi dalam Redbox..kui..kui..

And rest of it...ada special guest...sian guest of honor balik2 kene nyanyi...maklom la....RAHSIAAA aaaaa......sorry guys...plan korang nak suprise aku tak jadi..heehhe...but u guys punya effort i really appreciate it!!! LOVE U GALSSSS....MMMUAHH!

And to "who shall not to be mentioned" (mcm citer harry potter hehe..)...u came miles away just to be with me on my Birthday..and there will be many more birthday coming for us to celebrate together...its not the gift or special arrangement..expensive or cheap..but being you around on my special day is the greatest gift u ever gave!

And to Ira & Ray...thanks for everything...tunggu next turn...August turn Ira..September turn Ray...wahhh...tiap2 bulan ni...ni tgh tunggu sakae sushi orang naik pangkat!!! muahahhahaa...

Pagi Yang Cerah Untuk Jiwa Yang Sepi

pagi biar kusendiri

jangan kau mendekat

wahai matahari

dingin hati yang bersedih

tak begitu tenang

mulai terabaikan

hari yang cerah untuk jiwa yang sepi

begitu terang untuk cinta yang mati

ah…ku coba bertahan dan tak bisa

kubu langit kelabuku

tak begitu luas

seperti memudar

kini tak terulang lagi

di hari yang cerah

dia telah pergi

hari yang cerah untuk jiwa yang sepi

ahh….ku coba bertahan dan tak bisa

ahh….mencoba melawan ku lepas

hari yang cerah untuk jiwa yang sepi…

begitu terang untuk jiwa yang mati

ahh…kucoba bertahan dah tak bisa

ahh…mencoba melawan kulepas

semua telah hilang …

semua telah ….

Chenta Baru Hati Ku...

Yesterday i dapat claim..masyukk gaks la...then pk2...since my bithday is round the corner so semalam g la beli hadiah untuk diri sendiri...apa salahnya treating myself skali skala kan? so...since my old phone pun dah ala2 menyakitkan hati..so trade in and get new one..hehehe...tepon apa? HTC Tytn II...hiks..hiks...ni la...

Dah lama mak idamkan tepon ni...salah satu sebab tepon lama time drive tak leh sms sbb dia touch screen..yg ni pun touch screen...tapi blakang dia ada keypad...so bley la langgar undang-undang jalanraya sms time drive..hehehehe...

Tapi bila dah balik tetiba laks teringat tepon lama ku...berjasa gak dia tu..mcm2 dia ingat kan...kejut bangun pagi, kejut makan ubat, set appoinment aku, teman aku time aku tgh boring2..main game....mekasih tepon lama...jasa mu ku kenang selamanya.. :-)